Rachel: Hey Joey, what would you do if someone that you slept with told you that she was pregnant?
Joey: (warily) Who called here? Did she sound blond? Huh? Did-did-did she have an accent? I gotta make a call! (Starts to leave) I shoulda never walked into that Sunglass Hut

- Friends, Season 8

Ross: Yeah but uh... Okay, okay look you guys know that Rachel and I slept together, but there's something else. Rachel's pregnant.
Joey: (simultaneously) Oh my God!!! I can't believe that!!
Phoebe: (simultaneously) Holy mother of God!!!
Ross: With my child.
Phoebe: That is brand new information!!
Ross: You already know don't you?
Phoebe: A little

- Friends, Season 8

Ross: Yeah, I need uh... I'm just -- I don't know -- I don't understand, umm, how this happened? We-we used a condom.
Rachel: I know. I know, but y'know condoms only work like 97% of the time.
Ross: What? What? What?!! Well they should put that on the box!!!
Rachel: They do!
Ross: No they don't!!! (He runs to the bedroom to check and returns with his box of condoms.) Well they should put it in huge black letters!!!!
Rachel: Okay Ross come on let's just forget about the condoms.
Ross: Oh well I may as well have!

- Friends, Season 8

Joey: Umm, now uh... It's a scary world out there, especially for a single mom. Y'know, now I always thought you and I had a special bond so... (He goes to one knee and pulls out a ring.) Phoebe Buffay, will you marry me?
Monica: Oh my God! Joey!
Phoebe: Hell yeah! I'll marry you! 
Monica: You can't marry him!
Phoebe: Hey lady, your day's over! It's my turn!
Monica: Phoebe!
Joey: Why?! Why can't she marry me?!
Phoebe: I can and I will! (Kisses him.)
Monica: She's not pregnant. It's Rachel. Rachel's the one who's pregnant.
Joey: Oh my God.
Phoebe: Hey!
Monica: Phoebe I think he would notice if you didn't have a baby in nine months!
Phoebe: It's Joey!

- Friends, Season 8

Joey: About a month ago this guy spent the night with Rachel, I didn’t see who it was but… (He walks out and closes the door.)
Phoebe: Was that story over?

- Friends, Season 8
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